Questions?

Good morning, everyone!  I hope you had a wonderful weekend.  I definitely did.  I enjoyed home-puttering, boat ride, visit and cookout on neighboring island, dinner with friends, dress-up party at the local marina and plentiful dancing, leisurely breakfasts, movies from the comfort of couches, book-reading and - of course - Angel antics.

My post today is focused on YOU.  What questions do you have about island living or otherwise related to Choosing The Better Life?  Please submit your questions as comments here or on Facebook (www.facebook.com/ChoosingTheBetterLife), and I'll answer them in an upcoming post.  Thanks again for reading along.  I hope you have a wonderful week!

Island Back-Story: How I Discovered This Tiny Paradise

(Editor's Note:  Originally posted on March 16, 2012, this post has been updated to add in pictures!  Once I retrieved old photo albums from storage, and consulted my dad's pilot's logs for details of our early trips, I corrected a few errors in memory and added the old pics!  Enjoy.)

Since the island is so small, and so far from where I lived in the States most of my life, how in the world did I ever find it?  Well . . .

15-Year-Old Midwestern Girl

Let’s go back in time to the mid-80’s . . . Madonna was huge.  So was hair.  As a 15-year-old girl, I primped quite a bit, finding the perfect combination of eye shadow and blue eyeliner, twirling a curling iron for hours, plumping up shoulder pads and otherwise behaving like a stereotypical teenage girl.

Still an 80's girl in my Senior photo a few years later.

Landlocked in the Midwest, I was beside myself with excitement over an upcoming family trip – to the exotic Bahamas!

Southern Flyer

Years before, while we still lived in a Southern state, my dad started taking flying lessons.  Eventually, he obtained his private pilot’s license, and my parents bought a small airplane with another couple.  Flying with my dad replaced long road trips as our mode of transportation for visits to extended family and vacations. 

Mom and Dad always took at least one kid-free vacation every year.  Because the Bahamas are known as a pilot’s haven with all the island-hopping that can be done and beautiful aerial views of the multi-hued water, my parents and another pilot couple started flying to the Bahamas for their grown-up getaways.  Usually visiting three spots during a week’s vacation, they found themselves saving one particular island for last, recognizing it as a favorite.

That First Trip and Its Many Surprises

After several years of this, my parents decided they loved it so much that they wanted to share it with my brother and me.  So, in lieu of lots of Christmas presents, we were going to spend the holiday in the Bahamas!  Bundled in parkas and winter gear, we loaded our suitcases packed with swimsuits and shorts into the airplane.  We shivered our way through a bitterly cold take-off and began to make our way across the country toward Florida. 

The movie Iron Eagle was recently released, and a favorite of my younger brother (age 11 that year).  Our first surprise on the trip was that Dad made a cassette recording as “Chappy” from the movie, narrating the different cities and points of interest we were flying over.  He timed it to coordinate with the nav points he was flying and, whenever he made one of the control beeps start going off, my brother and I switched on our Walkman and listened to “Chappy” explain what we were seeing below!  (It was very cool to us at the time, and, now, it is even more special thinking about all of his effort and creativity!)

I still have Dad's "Chappy" letter in my scrapbook!

We landed in Florida for an overnight stay, and my parents made an adventure of not letting my brother and me know where we were.  We took a taxi to the hotel, and I learned later that Dad had the driver take a circuitous route to avoid the extensive billboards advertising this major tourist destination.  As we were getting settled into our hotel room, there was a knock on the door which, oddly, our parents had my brother and me answer.  Surprise number two – there stood our grandparents!  The family had arranged for them to join us from their northern state for this adventure and to spend the holiday together.  Delightful!

Once we were all together, my parents revealed the third surprise – our location, Orlando, and a detour to Disney World!  We had never been, and my parents, somewhat concerned that two teenagers would be bored on a tiny, remote island, added this to the itinerary for some extra thrill.  So imagine THEIR surprise and horror when I burst into disappointed tears.  Excited to work on my tan and travel out of the country – my first time ever – Disney World was an unwelcome delay that would eat into that time.  How parents make it through teenage years is beyond me!  I settled down, and we all had a wonderful time in Disney World.

The Islands of the Bahamas

Finally, it was time!  We flew into the Bahamas, cleared Customs on one island, then flew to this small island that my parents loved - yup, the same one I now call home.

Like our parents, my brother and I quickly loved this place!  We enjoyed the sun, marveled at the Bahamian dialect and manner of speaking and otherwise enjoyed all things tourist.

Tourist photo op:  picking up starfish!

We stayed in the best accommodations available on the island, although they were still fairly primitive by U.S. city standards.  Our little cottage was itty-bitty for the four of us.  We were thankful to have running water, but it was not fresh water!  We showered in brackish water and brushed our teeth from the gallon jug of fresh water that housekeeping brought each day.  At night, we slept with the lights on after realizing that large cockroaches came out of hiding in the dark and covered the ceiling and walls – ewwww!

We stayed in the double-decker "houseboat" on the right.

This hardly sounds like the kind of place my primping 15-year-old self would tolerate, much less love.  But love it I did.  

The locals and visitors were all so very friendly.  We enjoyed three delicious meals each day at the marina’s club.  The beaches boasted the softest, whitest sand.  And the water was the clearest and prettiest I have ever seen, before or since. 

Snorkeling in the clear water.

Best of all, our little cottage came with a 12-foot Boston Whaler, so we cruised all over the island chain in our little boat, stopping to swim, snorkel, hunt for sand dollars, explore and lounge on the beaches.  I also loved to softly bob on the anchored boat, singing along to Madonna’s “La Isla Bonita” while I soaked in the sun.  It was paradise.

Our little boat in the setting sun, photo taken from the houseboat porch.

And So On and So Forth

Thus began a love affair with this island that would endure for decades.  Thrilled that my brother and I loved the island, my parents turned this into an annual trip for us all.  

Second trip, 1987, ages 16 and 12.

Every Christmas for years to come, we’d pile into the plane and fly to our little slice of heaven.  As the years passed and we became “regulars,” we enjoyed trading stories and catching up with the locals and other regulars.

1987, my second trip, with brother and mom and two Bahamian friends who have now known me 26 years!

It really became a home away from home.  Eventually, my parents bought land on the island and, some years after that, built a vacation home.  “Renters no more!” people liked to tease.

As the years passed, life threw its curve balls, as it does to so many people.  For one, my parents divorced (as you may have surmised from other posts), but the island home remains in my family.  Thanks especially to the generosity of my mother I am happily nesting in our family home, complete with decades of fond memories. 

I am grateful to my parents for bringing me to this special place all those years ago and making it possible for the wonderful island experiences to be part of my world - then and now.

Stateside Visits

Ahhh, home sweet home!  I am happily back on the island after being away much too long.  Although I was keeping up with this blog from afar, I’ve actually been traveling through Florida the last couple of weeks.  You might think I’d enjoy a return to “civilization,” with its restaurants and salons and Target stores.  But, really, it’s always just so darn HECTIC!  I love, love, love the chance to spend time with family and friends.  And I do take the opportunity to stock up on things I can’t get on the island.  But, oh, the traffic, and the running around, and I just miss home.  (Plus, I gained three pounds!)  Of course, keeping it all in perspective, it is still definitely part of my Better Life!

I initially flew back to Florida to spend time with northern friends who were vacationing in Key West, but I had to make a pit stop first.  As you may recall, Angel’s mysterious foot malady necessitated a veterinarian consult.  So, arriving mid-day to South Florida, Angel and I spent the first afternoon at the vet.  Speculating that she was bitten by some island insect or critter, the vet gave her some anti-inflammatory and anti-itch stuff.  More significantly, since she had ripped off the vet’s fancy foot bandage within minutes of reaching my mother’s house, we quickly outfitted her with a cone to keep her from licking or biting her paw.  She milked the pathetic look on her face, but, by the following week, her foot was better, so it all paid off. 

After squeezing in a few hours at my dad’s house nearby with some long-time family friends who were visiting (hello, guys!), I ditched Angel at my mom’s and headed for Key West early the next morning.  The road trip takes several hours, but it is a beautiful drive on an overseas highway, if you’ve never done it.   

The next few days were a delightful time, catching up with dear friends and their little boy.

Brian and I have been good friends since we started law school together almost 18 years ago!

Brian's lovely wife, Lisa, became one of my closest girlfriends over years of dinners, guitar lessons and "Craft Club!"

Brian, Lisa and the ever-charming, precocious and delightful Evan.  (Hi, Evan!)

My friends had rented a cute little Key West cottage with a heated pool, so – despite it being winter – even I joined them for swims.  We strolled Duvall Street, had a dolphin adventure at the Dolphin Research Centre in nearby Marathon, and otherwise kicked around together and enjoyed catching up on our respective lives.

Mallory Square sunset

On my last evening with them, as we joined the throngs of people in Mallory Square for the famous Key West sunset, I tried REALLY hard to appreciate it and not compare it to the amazing sunsets that spoil me most nights at home.  :) 

Enjoying my cherished friends, regardless of the sunset.

Towards the end of the week, I headed back to my family in South Florida, staying either at my mom's or my dad's, who thankfully live just 15 minutes apart.  In between errands, I enjoyed meeting up with former co-workers (Grace, send me our picture!).  I also relished catching up with my dear friend Jillian.  

With Jillian at First Watch restaurant

Jillian and I first bonded while studying for the Florida Bar together 14 years ago!  On my visits to Florida - which Jillian agrees are far more frequent now that I live in another country!! - we usually get together for a lunchtime gabfest.  We've taken to meeting at First Watch, a restaurant that I have loved since I waitressed there (in another city) during my high school and college years.  (Shout out to Kris and Vito!)  My odd habit of putting ranch dressing on scrambled eggs stems from some of their creative menu items.

Meanwhile, a family member of dear island friends passed away in North Florida.  Rather than fly home and then right back to Florida (with the expense that goes with that), I decided to just stay in Florida until time for the services.  So, I drove a little north and enjoyed spending the weekend with my beloved brother.

My brother, the grill master.

I spent a few days doing the ever-present “island errands:”  golf cart parts, West Marine, Home Depot, IKEA, bank runs, various meetings, get taxes in the mail, pedicure, etc.  

Then, my beau flew in to join me, and we drove several hours north to see our good friends in their difficult time and attend the lovely memorial service.  He returned to the island on Sunday, but I couldn’t go yet.  “Island errands” always include a last-minute grocery run and a vet visit within 48 hours of departure to complete the required Bahamian paperwork.  So, I had to wait until the vet opened on Monday, then also went to the grocery store, made another Home Depot run, changed the oil in my ancient run-around-Florida car, did laundry and packed up to return.

In the wee hours of the morning on Tuesday, I loaded up the many bags of groceries, repair parts, toilet bowl brushes and other miscellany, clothes and one excited dog, and headed to the private hangar at a nearby airport for a shared charter service to fly me home to the island.  With Angel on my lap in her carrier bag, I sank into one of nine small passenger seats on a 7:00 a.m. flight back home.

Phew!  I remember when going to see my family in Florida meant ditching the cold north and spending leisurely days of sleeping in, reading, dozing in the sun, lounging around with family and occasionally exerting enough effort to take a shower and meet a friend for lunch.  Now, my visits are extremely hectic, and I drive back and forth with a kajillion island errands.  (By the way, I’ve decided that “kajillion” really is, or should be, a word.)

But, lest you think I’m complaining, this is all just to paint the picture for you of how different things feel to me these days.  On a daily basis, I am Choosing The Better Life for myself.  While stuck in Florida traffic, I’m reminded of the daily commuter traffic in icy conditions that I no longer have to endure and am thankful that the current traffic is a temporary condition for me.  Running around to West Marine or Home Depot, I focus on how lucky I am to be buying fishing lures for the next fun boat excursion or planning a bathroom remodel in an oceanfront home.  Driving several hours to see friends turns into a time to simply breathe, sing along to music, and think how much I value my friendships and the dear friends who live far away or who are having a difficult time. 

My Better Life is not just because I moved to live on an island (although, of course, that’s pretty darn fabulous).  Rather, it is a state of mind, an appreciation for the small, simple things in life and trying to keep things in perspective.  For me, that approach started before I ever moved, and, I believe, is what helped lead me to making the bigger decisions that have brought so much joy to my life.  Given that, you can Choose The Better Life for yourself, too, no matter where you live!  Welcome home.

Angel with Coconut (Video)

Dear Readers, I thought you might enjoy a little snippet of my Island Dog in action.  Angel looooooooves to chase and chew coconuts.  These particular clips were not actually filmed in the islands; you'll see Angel and me in a Florida backyard when we visited family recently.  The first video clip (17 seconds) is a little better quality, but the second one (27 seconds) amuses me because you can really hear how Angel squeaks and squeals in her excitement while chewing.  My vocal little dog.  Enjoy!

 

Before & After

This blog’s “About” page narrates a bit about my life before and after making the decisions that led me to life on an island.  That’s the big picture.  But all kinds of minutiae really drive home how my life has changed – for the better - from BEFORE to NOW.  For example:

Before - The alarm clock would jolt me rudely awake in the morning. 
Now - I never use an alarm.  Instead, I awaken naturally around 6:30 a.m. – give or take 15 minutes – as the light filters in.  If I’m really drowsy, my back-up “alarm” is the sound of the 6:30 a.m. boat passing by with people from a neighboring island heading to work on my island and others nearby. 

Before - I paid oodles of money to a City salon every few months to add blonde highlights to my dark blonde hair. 
Now - No salon.  Although still dark blonde at the roots as it’s growing in, my hair overall is super-bleached out by the sun and salt.  For free. 

Before - I almost always wore heels of some sort when I went out in the evening. 
Now - I almost always wear flip-flops when I go out in the evening.  And, umm, that would be my nice flip-flops, as opposed to my kick-around daytime flip-flops!  :) 

Before – I didn’t pay much attention to the night sky, and didn’t see many stars when I did. 
Now – Every night is a dazzling show of wonder.

Before – My lunch was usually a store-bought sandwich eaten at my desk as I worked.  Dinner was either a restaurant meal or bag of chips/dip in front of the tv at home. 
Now – Although I occasionally enjoy a dinner out on the town (you know, at one of the two restaurants), lunches and dinners are usually home-cooked and healthy.  Yes, Mom, even fruits and vegetables! 

Before – I rarely to never exercised.  I even paid someone to walk my dog while I was at work. 
Now – I walk my dog several times a day, and enjoy getting together with friends for outdoor yoga or brisk walks through the island.

Before – I saw my family in Florida for a week at Christmas and a couple other quick trips each year. 
Now – I spend time with my family almost every month when I pop over to Florida for island errands, doc appointments, etc.

Before – Despite plenty of friends in the City, we were all busy in our lives, and there were plenty of times that I was simply lonely.
Now – I am surrounded by loved ones and interact with friends on a daily basis.  Just walking out the front door, I’ll bump into a handful of friends while walking the dog or running to the store for an onion. 

Before – Dinner with friends was a fun night out at a trendy restaurant. 
Now – Dinner with friends is a fun night in - a more laid-back, intimate gathering, taking turns hosting in our own homes. 

Before – I loved my downtown condo, but my view was a very urban one:  looking at other condos from the front and overlooking a not-so-glamorous alley from the back! 
Now – Water, water, water is my peaceful view from most living areas of my home. 

Before – I was fairly addicted to taking taxicabs everywhere.
Now – Addiction cured; no taxis exist on the island! 

Before – Although I recycled, I didn’t think much more about waste or garbage. 
Now – I try not to waste food, and I compost scraps since I don’t have a food disposal.  I’m also acutely aware that any waste I create goes to the local dump, which we try to contain since it’s a tiny island and there’s nowhere else for garbage to go!

Before - I went to work in the dark and came home in the dark.  Fresh air and I interacted very little. 
Now - I am outside frequently throughout the day and eve, and, even when I'm inside, I usually have the windows and doors thrown open to the ocean breeze. 

Before – On occasion, I would feel happy immediately upon waking.  But most mornings, I felt either ambivalence or actual dread of the day. 
Now – Most days, I wake up happy, content, rested, peaceful and looking forward to the day.

Random Things I Didn't Know About Island Life

After visiting this island for 25 years, sometimes for long stretches, I really thought I had a pretty good handle on the ins and outs of island living.  Silly, I suppose, given that there is ALWAYS something new to learn in any venture.  Also, I thought I knew how tough the ever-present elements of salt, sun, sand and humidity were on materials.  Nope.  I’ve had plenty of surprises, small and large, or simply things I hadn’t considered before.  Such as:

• “Stainless Steel” means what is says.  It will stain LESS, but it is not rustproof in the way I took for granted in the States.  Even my best kitchen knives bear rust spots here and there.  And I had to put away the cute silver soap caddies I brought with me because they were leaving rust spots on the kitchen and bathroom counters.

• Elastic just doesn’t last.  Waistbands of underwear seem to suffer the worst, followed by cute little bikinis that I probably paid too much for.  They just stretch and stretch and become unusable.

 

This elastic hanging in there - so far.

• A bottle of conditioner in the shower alongside the shampoo is simply not enough.  I also keep a bottle of heavy duty detangler conditioner on hand to battle the wind snarls after a day on the boat.

• You know how your mother may have told you always to wear clean underwear before you leave the house in case you’re in a car accident or whatever?  Consider having to purge the dresser drawers so that only decent-looking underwear remains - because it will be strung out on a laundry line every week for all of the neighbors to see.

• Golf carts don’t have gas gauges.  As a teenager, my father drilled into me that there is no excuse to run out of gas in the car.  As soon as that gas gauge even approached dipping below a quarter tank, I’d fill up.  Apparently, I didn’t realize how reliant I was on the gas gauge.  Although I know my golf cart needs gas refills, it just doesn’t occur to me very often.  For the first time in 40 years, I’ve run out of gas.  Sorry, Dad.

• Rainbows happen more often than I’ve seen in the States.  I suppose it’s the vast expanse of reflective water, bright sunshine and frequent little rain squalls.  No matter the reason, I love them!

So much more breath-taking in person, but you get the idea.

• Men (generalizing, sorry) pee in the bush far more than I would have imagined, even when a proper toilet is not that far away.

• Although I will always and forever be a strong proponent of education, book learning pales in comparison to the value of mechanical/electrical/carpenter and all ‘round handy-man skills.

• I don’t get tired of eating fish.

• Forget steel wool – scrubbing a scorched pan with sand in the salty sea works far better.

• Even when the power goes out (with unfortunate frequency), I can still cook dinner since my stove/oven uses propane gas.  Cooking by flashlight and candles!

• With one notable exception, it is almost impossible to make bubbles with soap in saltwater.  On those occasions when I take my bath in the sea out back because the fresh water supply isn’t working, I lather up with the one and only Joy.

By Procter & Gamble, but not a paid advertisement!

• I float pretty well (part of my problem with diving), but I am a GREAT floater in the summer.  The combination of warm water and more salt in the sea in those months increases buoyancy.

• Telephones go out with great frequency (not a surprise to me), but phone service actually stayed on during Hurricane Irene when we were hours and hours without electricity and in winds of 70+mph!

• Beautiful sunsets are not a rare treat.  They happen spectacularly almost every single day – and I appreciate every one of them.

Sharks & Eels & Barracudas, Oh My!

For as many years as I can remember as a child, I loved curling up with family and a bowl of popcorn and watching the once-a-year televised airing of The Wizard of Oz.  (Somehow, that felt far more special than our ability now to download or watch a DVD any ol' time you please.)   Anyway, one of the memorable lines in the movie was Dorothy's innocent exclamation, "Lions and tigers and bears - oh my!"  As I delve deeper (no pun intended) into my new world, I am far more apt to blurt, "Shark!" or "Eel!" or "Barracuda!"  Oh my.

Living on an island means all kinds of encounters with all kinds of creatures, large and small, on land and sea.  In the sea, especially when out diving near the edge of the deepest parts of the ocean, we often see a variety of creatures of the sea.

Sometimes it's fun!  From time to time we're treated to visions of dolphins splashing around.  I mean REAL dolphin, as in porpoise-like mammals, not the dolphin fish also known as mahi-mahi (which we fish for because they are delicious!).

Last month, for example, we were out one Saturday morning and saw a group of dolphin jumping and playing nearby.  I counted at least seven jumping in arcs above the water, and I could see splashes and grey forms underwater of many more.  These mammals are amazing, so graceful.  I regret now that I didn’t jump in to swim with them.  At the time, the guys were focused on diving, I didn’t have my snorkel gear handy and the water was cold, so I just stood and watched.  Next time, I’ll jump in regardless!

Next best thing, swimming with dolphins at the Dolphin Research Center in Marathon, Florida (pictured here).

Sometimes, more dangerous creatures are spotted.  During that same dive trip last month, for example, a big Moray eel, as big as our smallest diver, was lurking under a large rock formation.  Experience taught this diver well.  He knew not to swim into a dark hole.  Rather, he approached low at a distance and peered into the hole first.  Since the eel had already laid claim to that spot, the diver simply swam away.

We also see sharks fairly often.  Sharks have a bad reputation and are actually protected now because their numbers are dwindling as people have killed them off.   Around here, we have a healthy respect for sharks.  Generally, the ones we run into most don’t usually mess with people, unless there is blood in the water.  The divers also are familiar with different types of sharks.  If a nurse shark comes around (like the ones in the Photo Tour at the fish bench), divers typically stay in the water.  Or, if other species of shark come around (e.g., reef shark, tiger shark), divers often stay in the water if the shark is less than 6, 7, 8 feet.  The divers watch the shark and gauge the danger level.  Not me – any shark, no matter the size or species, prompts me back into the boat!

Also during that same eventful dive trip last month, we had a real shark encounter.  As I dozed in the sun on the bow of the boat, three men swam in the water as the boat followed nearby.  I heard someone say “shark” one time, and I immediately jumped up to see where the guys were.  In that instant, two of the divers were already scrambling back onto the boat.  The third was about 20 feet away and we shouted to him to come in, which he did safely.

As the divers tell it, one of them saw the shark swimming low and fast beneath them and saw that it was huge.  He called out “shark” as he swam to the boat.  The diver near him heard “shark” and turned to check it out.  Again, sharks are not uncommon or reason to get in the boat always, so this diver was looking to see what kind of shark it was and whether any danger was posed.  At this point the shark had turned, so the diver couldn’t see his hammerhead or his full length.  But the diver saw his big belly and an astounding girth of four feet, enough to spur him toward the boat after his buddy.  If the girth was that wide, what must have been the length?!  

He later only-half-jokingly told his buddy that next time, the spotter needs to yell “BIG shark” so he doesn’t take the time to look for himself!  The third diver, eyes wide in his snorkel mask, heard all the commotion and got himself back to the boat quickly, though he gave his buddies a hard time about ditching him!  (They didn't really, and our skilled driver had already thrown the boat into gear to get close to the divers and to possibly ward off the shark with the sound of an engine.)

The other reputedly fearsome ocean creature that I have personally encountered is Barracuda.  Despite the mouthful of scary-looking teeth, I find these long silvery fish to be pretty.  Perhaps that's my girlie-girl love of shiny sparkly things.  However, it is that same love of shiny sparkly things that I must guard against when going in the water.  Barracuda, and other creatures, mistake glints of light off of jewelry for shiny and delicious fish.  Since I really have no desire to be chomped on by a barracuda - or anything else - I leave earrings, anklets and all jewelry at home on days where I'll be swimming in the water anywhere deeper than my backyard beach.  I also forgo wearing my favorite colorful and sequined swimsuits in favor of more subdued colors with no sparkles.  Seriously.  The first time I joined the guys on a dive trip, I jumped overboard in my hot pink bathing suit to swim along with the spear-fishing action, and they referred to me as shark bait.  Indeed, I had my first in-water encounter with a nurse shark that day!  At a distance, but still.

Now that I'm blogging with you, I'll try to take more pictures - even (or especially) in the midst of sharks, eels and barracudas - oh my!  For now, your vivid imaginations can fill in the gaps.  :)