Three Weeks of Travel (and a friend's 40th birthday!)

FINALLY!  I'm back!  What a whirlwind it's been these last few weeks . . .

After a flurry of activity on the island, Beau and I were ready for a relaxing getaway to the Florida Keys.  However, the day before we were to leave, my mother reported that my grandmother had just been taken by ambulance to the hospital.  Yikes!  I put my packing into overdrive, snagged the last seat on the afternoon plane, grabbed Angel and left my island home for three weeks!  Thankfully, Grandma lives near Mom in South Florida, which is where Beau and I were headed the next day anyway.  Beau was out diving that day - opening day of lobster season! - so he didn't even know of my last-minute departure until he returned home to my note!

I'm happy to report that my Grandmother is just fine.  I spent that evening and the next morning with her in the hospital.  Glad to know she was okay and would be returning home soon, I picked up Beau at the airport and we headed south.  

The next few days brought lots of relaxing, Olympics-viewing and good times with local friends.  The following week, Beau headed back to work on the island, and I stayed in South Florida to run a slew of island errands and visit with family.

Glad I was there, too, because my Grandmother's husband was taken by ambulance to the hospital!  He ended up right in the room next to where she'd been admitted just the week before.  Sigh.  Happily, he is fine now, too.  But I was glad to be able to help transport Grandma back and forth and share hospital responsibilities with my mother.  My grandparents are in great shape, but they are in their late 80's and stuff just happens!

Eventually, it was time for the last leg of my trip - a return to the Midwest for a close friend's 40th birthday weekend getaway!  Angel remained comfortably with my mother (who dotes on her grandpuppy - thanks, Mom!), and I jetted off for a fabulous weekend.  Beau had travel plans with other friends, so he wasn't able to join me.

However, before Beau left but while I was away from the cay, a dear friend of mine from law school ended up on our tiny island and tracked down Beau, whom he'd met 15 years ago when Beau and I were first dating!

Beau and Brian, living it up without me!

It KILLED me not to be there with them!  But I eased my suffering by heading off on my adventure with friends.  Upon landing in the heartland, a girlfriend picked me up at the airport and we drove several hours to a quaint, countryside town for the birthday weekend.

The Girls!  Let the fun begin . . .

 

Birthday Girl and her Hubby, who masterfully planned the wonderful weekend.

My Besties, at a wine-tasting before dinner.

About to embark on a canoe trip.

Love the group t-shirts!  Her husband printed nicknames on all - mine was "Blogger!"

Lining up with our canoes.

My roomie and canoe partner BEFORE I kept steering her into the bush.

Captain Donna after we switched spots - apparently, I'm a better bowman.

Scenic and lovely.

Bloody Marys and comfort food after our hard work.

Dinner at the charming hotel.

I just loved the trains against the country backdrop.

The whole gang, sans Beau.

The Blondes.

The girls with the cake before dinner.

So much fun!  A great time was had by all, and it was so wonderful to catch up with friends.  I headed back to the Big City and enjoyed dinner that evening with other dear friends.  

The next morning, after breakfast with yet another great girlfriend, I headed into my old office!  I spent FIVE HOURS in the law firm, visiting three floors of attorneys and staff.  Yes, it was a little surreal, but it was heart-warming to see old friends with whom I'd spent every work day for more than 10 years!  Everyone commented that island life seems to agree with me, and this visit reaffirmed it that much more.  I simply laughed and reminded them that they just are not used to seeing what "relaxed" people look like!  :)

Then, it was back to Florida for one more day of final island errands, including vet certificates so Angel can re-enter the Bahamas and a giant grocery run.  Added on to the many "island errands" from the week prior, it amounted to quite a haul!  I told Beau it was a truck kind of day, rather than a golf cart kind of day, for my airport pickup back on the island!

Angel and I happily landed on the island and greeted with Beau with enthusiasm, then I began the long process of unpacking and organizing all the stuff.  Like what?  Think: new cordless phone since power surges fried the old one despite its protector, loads of cleaning supplies, dog food, plastic bins/organizers, new bedsheets, file folders, printer ink, bathroom supplies, superglue, cooler full of meat for the deep freezer, stacks of dry goods, etc.  

It was a great trip - though three weeks is too long to be gone, I think - and wonderful to return.  We went out last evening and it was such fun to see "the guys" and other island friends.  Home sweet home.

And now, our home sweet home reluctantly welcomes Tropical Storm Isaac.  So far, so good . . . Enjoy your weekend!

What's Up?

My dearest Better Lifers, I have missed you! 

Since launching this blog four months ago (is that all?  It feels like we've been together longer than that!), this is the longest I've been away from you.  It has been exceptionally busy lately - even for "island busy!"  Some of the reasons why will warrant individual blog posts in the future, but, in a nutshell, here's what I've been up to:

• Beau's dog, Milo, injured himself somehow and has been limping.  To keep him from running and wrestling with the other island dogs, we've been keeping him contained in the house - which means double duty for me on dog baths and tick checks!

• My beau just turned 50!  He threw a weekend-long party in the center of town, so we were busy with all kinds of party prep - and enjoying the parties!

• Lots of beau's family (and friends) came in from Nassau and other places to celebrate with us.  At one point, I had 15 people staying in the house!

• In the midst of all this, we've had some home renovation projects underway.  The morning that the first family arrived, my bedroom, bathroom and closet contents were still sitting in the living room!  The new tile dried and I scrambled to move everything back.  After family left, the renovations resumed, so the house is still a bit chaotic.

• As part of the kids program we run, we went overnight camping on another island with 17 children ages 5 to 14!  Came home, showered, slept a couple hours and then went back out to conduct the "graduation ceremony" now that the summer program is concluded.

• A storm system passed through more than a week ago, with lots of rain, thunder and lightning.  Most notable, however, was that the tower in George Town was struck by lightning, so I have been without internet service until today! 

• Today lends itself well to catching up on the internet after a two-week hiatus because I am spending most of my time lying on the couch.  To treat myself to a "Better Life" kind of day after getting through everything above, I went out with friends yesterday for a boat ride and swim on a gorgeous day.  While wading through a channel, I stepped on a sea urchin - EEEEOOOOOWWWW!  I'll explain more about that soon, but it ain't pretty.  I'm nursing 19 sticker pricks in my right foot.

Ahhh, island living.  I'm still loving it!  I look forward to catching up with you more soon.

Choosing To Be Unbusy

I've joked about being "island busy."  That is, my days stay full of activity, but I'm cognizant that it's not the same stressful levels as when I lived in the States.  

Lately, however, I've been feeling the press of those old "hectic" feelings creeping into my island bliss.  You know the ones I mean:

• I'm so busy.
• I can't get through everything on my To Do List.
• I can't seem to get caught up.
• There's not enough time to do the things I want to do. 
• I'm turning down fun offers for the tasks I feel I "should" be doing.

IT'S TIME TO PRESS THE PAUSE BUTTON.

I live on an island for heaven's sake!  I walked away from a "big career" and left the City so I could enjoy the things in life that were more important to me.  I made a conscious choice to Better my Life in big and small ways every day.  I don't even have a freakin' job - how can I be too busy?!

How did this happen?  Slowly, over time, I've allowed my commitments and my own tendencies to crowd the relaxed island pace I'd been enjoying.

Some of it is an increase in responsibilities:  running a summer kids' program, house issues popping up that need addressed, spending more time developing blog and writing opportunities, etc.

Some of it stems from my own personality traits:  conscientious list-maker with a strong work ethic.  Even my 86-year-old grandmother rarely sits down - though she certainly should! - in the course of any given day.  Always busy, busy, busy.  In the work world, those traits masquerade as ambition and reliability and good things to help us advance.  But we just get busier.

Part of my Better Life has been letting go of Type A tendencies and being more flexible.  While I've managed to sustain that, I've let my penchant for being busy accumulate into a way that I'm no longer liking.

Perhaps that's why I relished that French Toast and my pseduo "day off" earlier this week.  It was my first attempt at slowing things back down, relieving myself of the drive to be "productive," and a reclaiming of some simple happiness.

After reading that post, my mother emailed me a link to an article about being too busy.  (Mom suffers from this malady as well - we are a direct line of descendents from the aforementioned busy grandmother!)  I promptly emailed her back, but said - no kidding - that I was too busy to read it until later!  Well, I finally read this wonderful article, and it gave me great pause.

On the New York Times Opinion Pages, Tim Kreider posted "The 'Busy' Trap."
I thought he was spot-on in his descriptions of, and musings about, the busy-ness that pervades our lives.  And what wonderful timing for me to be reading his article!

I've decided that, before I slide down that busy slope any more, I'm calling a halt and making some little changes.  I'm choosing to be less busy!  It means a shift in priorities.  It means giving myself permission (again) to not be "productive" every minute of the day, or even every day.  It means saying yes to fun offers and letting other things wait.  

In law school, and then later in law firm life, my best friend and I had a mantra that we would use to remind each other and ourselves not to freak out in trying to manage a seemingly impossible amount of work on tight deadlines  - IT ALL GETS DONE.  IT ALL ALWAYS GETS DONE.

While I am thankfully no longer working or living at that pace, I can apply the same mantra to my "island busy."  How have I implemented this specifically so far?

• For the past two mornings, I've spent over an hour exercising with friends.  Now, if you know me or if you've been reading this blog for a while, you'll recall that I am a morning person.  I'm most productive in the early hours of the day and I get lots done then!  Moreover, if I don't get a jump on it then, I tend to lose momentum and it takes me longer - or not at all - to get to certain things.  HOWEVER, morning is when my friends exercise.  Morning is when it's less sweltering on the island so it makes sense to exercise then.  So I've been exercising in the morning, instead of not at all!

• For the past two days, I have, in fact, felt the gap in productivity since I'm using my mornings differently.  BUT, I feel good about exercising.  I like how I feel physically.  I enjoy the time with friends.  I'm not missing any deadlines or postponing important stuff TOO long, so I just let any potential angst about not being as productive as I could/should be roll right off.

• After this morning's exercise, I was on my way home when I saw a few friends hanging out on their front porch.  Normally, I'd wave and head on home to get to work.  This morning, I stopped.  We chatted about last night's fireworks and festivities.  We traded tips on gardening and recipes related to the pumpkins and watermelons that our kids' camp children have planted.  We laughed. It was worth every minute.

• Eventually, I headed home.  However, along the way, I noticed some of the children sailing just offshore in small Sunfish as part of a sailing lesson by one of my friends.  Again, I decided to make time and stop.  I walked out to the dock and cheered each of the kids by name as they rounded the buoy on a successful tack.  I called out to my friend and traded quick pleasantries.  I chatted with one of the boys who was still ashore.  I smiled, inhaled the fresh air, enjoyed the pretty view, and just breathed a little easier.

• Now, instead of tackling house projects, I am drafting this blog.  I confess, partly it's because of those old "shoulds" creeping in.  Bloggers must post regularly to keep readers interested, blah, blah, blah.  But also, I just felt like it, and I wanted to share this mini-revelation and The 'Busy' Trap article with you all.

• I haven't been carrying my camera around and thinking about blog shots at every opportunity.  No worries, I'll get back to pictures because they are fun.  But, for now, this is one little nod to just going about my day in a slower, simpler, just-for-me kind of way.

And there you have it!  I'm back to Choosing a Better Life by choosing to be unbusy!  Or, well, at least LESS busy.  Baby steps, people.  :)  How are you going to extricate yourself from your own busy trap?